🐉

Where Sisqo revels in the magnitude of The New

So I heard the melody first, but the words didn’t really click.

And I had a date that night, we get back to the crib, we’re making out, and I’m rounding second base. She decides she wants to get up and strip.

It was the first time I had ever seen a thong.

And it was glorious.

I’m like literally writing the song, talking about the date that I was on. “Dress was so scandalous / You know them other guys can’t handle this”. This is real life.

The next day, my friends come over. I tell them, “Gather around. This girl had on a, a… a thong”. And they’re like, “A what now?”

Needless to say, all my boys were, literally, like, on a pilgrimage, you know, Lord of the Rings or whatever, just to go find a thong. This is really what happened, I shit you not.

And so when I get to the chorus, I didn’t know what I should say. My friend comes in, and he’s like, “Yo, stop the music”. Boom. “Yo, I was with this girl last night. And guess what she gave me”. I said, “What, what did she give you?”

And he was like, “That thong-th-thong-thong-thong”.

I was like, “Yo, what if right there I was like — what if I said ‘that thong-th-thong-thong-thong’”? They were like, “Haha, that’s funny, you would never do that.”

I was like, I think I’m gonna do that.